Doctor Zest's Traveling Medicine Show

Living a
Stress-Free Life

Part XII:
Emotional Tools to Banish Stress (continued)

Identifying Emotions

Most of our decisions are based, to a great extent, on the emotions we are experiencing at the time. Often, however, we may not be exactly aware of the emotions present in us at that particular moment. The A-Z Emotions List exercise next will illustrate this point.

The A-Z Emotions List you are about to view is the largest and most comprehensive list of emotionally related words presently available. I compiled it for 12 years until it now boasts a count of over 600! [Please, do not mail me anymore!]

Now and then I would utilize the list with clients, particularly if they seemed "stuck" or emotionless, listless, or depressed to the point that they could not identify their feelings. For example, I might start out by saying, "How are you feeling?" and they would either say "I don't know" or "I'm not sure" or something similar. I would then hand them the list with a pencil and tell them to read the list (it was shorter then) and circle the ones that seemed active in their lives lately. It was interesting to watch clients start out apathetically then, as they were "grabbed" by a certain word, watch them grind the pencil around a word and mutter something like, "'Disappointed'? I would say I'm disappointed alright!" The List never failed in revealing repressed emotions.

After the client did some circling we would have no shortage of things to discuss. Before they would leave I would always ask them, "Remember when you came in and I asked you how you were feeling and you said, 'I don't know.'" [Then it would go something like this:] They would nod. "Then you did the list and circled all those feeling-words?" They would nod. "Where do you think those feelings were?" They would shrug. I would answer for them, "Inside you! They were 'stored' because they were suppressed, repressed, or denied. [pause] Stop doing that!" They would nod. We might have to repeat this scenario for a few weeks until they got it — then I couldn't get a word in edgewise after that!

Don't feel like I am saying these people, or you, are stupid because we are not in touch with our feelings. We are methodically and often deliberately trained to suppress our emotions. We're just good learners! Me, too! When my teachers along the way said pay attention to your feelings I stared at them and said, "Of course!" but, didn't have a clue! The lessons from denial are often painful and make you definitely feel as if you are "a taco short of a combo dinner" besides! BUT: there is hope, dear one!

But first, as always, awareness is the key! So, now it's your turn to get aware of your feelings.

Read through the following list with a pencil circling words that are descriptive of your feelings. You may be surprised at how many there are!

The A-Z Emotions List

From the list circle the ones that are currently in your life. In the space to the right, pen a couple of words that identify the event/issue from which this particular feeling is emanating. This will take a few minutes.